Monday, May 7, 2012

Not Like The Movies

I guess it's safe to assume that we all love and hate that feeling. The tingling feeling from the most mundane acts that you get from the other person makes you wanna lose everything you have for "love's sake". It  really doesn't mean anything. It's as mundane as it is but you still hope it meant something else. It's a bubble you created for you own pleasure because you are a full-fledged hopeless romantic and you believe that somehow life is just like the movies.

Then after a while you decide to wake yourself up to reality.  You pop the bubble and deny that it existed.  But no matter how much you deny and suppress it, you can never lie to yourself and you know that the feelings are there, oblivious however of when it's gonna go away. A piece of you is still hoping, that just maybe, you have found the person for you, and that you wouldn't know what it is until you try.  After all, someone has to make the first move. You keep believing and you keep trying.

You still enjoyed relating yourself with Anna Scott in Notting Hill, convincing yourself that you're "just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her." Or perhaps, William Thacker in the same movie, who lived quite a modest life and found himself falling for a woman bigger than what his dreams can ever come out of. Or maybe you once saw yourself in Julia Stiles' character in 10 Things I hate About You. You once fell hardly in and out of love, and feared to fall in love all over again. Much more in Serendipity, which is my personal favorite, needless to say.  Hoping that as you stroll the city malls, you'd bump into a beautiful discovery that would change the chapters of your currently ridiculously boring love story.  You do this while you nibble on chocolate-covered prunes, even if you never ate prunes before, you crave the chocolate in it that induces the love hormones in your body (i.e. Oxytocin).

Once your romantic comedy movie marathon had finally ended, and you tune-in on your favorite reality show, you'd realize that even 'reality' shows aren't quite real.  That movie date that you've always longed for.  The dinner date in a fancy restaurant that serves fancy wines that you had always been planning in your head to take that special person to on his/her birthday the following month.  All these are not gonna happen to your sad disappointment. And you're sorry for yourself for bursting your own bubble.

Some real love stories do have pleasantly unhappy endings. There's no other way to take but to carry-on and become your stronger self. Sooner or later, you know you're gonna go through all that again. You would be once again willing to risk it all, for love's sake, only on a much stronger post because you would have realized by then that life is truly not quite like the movies.